Imagine me, you gained’t wish to miss these perks! Because it was below the Trump administration, institutional leaders who enroll will get precedence entry to White Home occasions and discussions with officers. We’ll additionally throw in “Conserving It Cozy with AOC” fleeces to your management staff and a private invite to my month-to-month “alphabet soup” lunch with the NEA, AFT, AAUP, ACLU, and AG Mamdani. And also you may wish to announce that every one federal pupil debt is forgiven to your present and former college students, as President Ocasio-Cortez is making ready an government order that can forgive all loans for anybody who attends or has attended an EZPassTM establishment.
“That is too good to be true!” you should be gasping. Properly, straighten your tams and maintain onto your tassels, there’s nonetheless extra. The dozen campus leaders who most effusively exhibit their enthusiasm for President AOC’s agenda might be invited to a particular “Celebrating Larger Ed’s All-Stars” dinner with the president and her high donors (suppose Trump crypto dinner—however BETTER!). The primary twenty analysis establishments to roll out a local weather plan permitted by my workplace will get entry to a particular day-long “working session” with the analysis impresarios on the Division of the Inside, Division of Power, and the Nationwide Science Basis. Signatories can even be invited to be a part of our “Nationwide Civic Engagement” technique, that includes White Home confabs with Bluesky influencers and an opportunity at particular aggressive grants for mission-aligned voter registration and mobilization.
I wish to be very clear: That is nothing greater than your pleasant Division of Schooling extending an open hand. Nobody ought to suppose I’m making an attempt to “make a suggestion you possibly can’t refuse,” as a result of that’s simply improper. However see, you bought a pleasant little college there, and it could be a disgrace if one thing occurred to it. Certainly, as my predecessor, former Secretary Linda McMahon, put it to varsity presidents 4 years in the past, “Establishments of upper schooling are free to develop fashions and values aside from these beneath, if the establishment elects to forego federal advantages.”
In AOC’s America, that is what democracy seems like. Now, it’s time to get with this system.
Warmly,
Rachel Maddow
U.S. Secretary of Schooling
